So I misunderstood the instructions for posting on this blog, and I wanted to try and catch up with the other great, insightful VISTAs on this team. In reading this blog I've noticed a lot of complicated feelings about the job of a VISTA, and I wanted to put in my two cents.

First and foremost I've seen this position as a learning opportunity. I'll admit, it's hard to never see the impact that you're making, and to work extremely hard for what you know is a fraction of what you know you could be making at something entirely different. It's also really different for me personally to be given so much responsibility (managing 137 volunteers), when at my previous jobs I wasn't even trusted to stand at the customer service desk.

I think the most important thing I've learned is that sitting at a desk and delivering indirect service isn't for me. However, I think a year worth of doing something I'm not always crazy about is worth getting the experience that will ultimately help me get to where I WANT to go. After this year I'll have an idea of how a non-profit works, and I'll be able to take that information and use it in the sort of grass-roots work that I think I'd prefer. Also, I now know that I absolutely love working with children. If I hadn't stumbled upon a VISTA job where I'd get to work with preschoolers, I might be on an entirely different career path right now. As it is, the plan is to work with kids in the social work or hearing and speech therapy fields.

So yes, I have days when I will pull my hair out if I have to send one more email or make one more spreadsheet. But I've decided to take it for what it is and learn from it. I know that this time next year freaking out about my PPRs will seem like no big deal.

The Aftermath of Disney Give a Day Get a Day

Two months ago, if you had asked me what my feelings were on the Disney Give a Day get a Day promotion, I would have been less than enthusiastic. I had the whole thing sprung on me the day after I returned from my holiday vacation, and from what I could tell at the time, the hundreds of emails that I received were from self-interested people that cared about Disney first, the kids second. People would be so blunt as to tell me, "I want to get this reading thing done by [a specific date] because I'm going to Disney in March," or, "can I read twice? I want two tickets."
Our program requires a six month commitment and encourages volunteers to develop strong and lasting relationships with the kids they serve. There was no way I was going to go through an hour of paperwork just so that John Doe could use the kids in our program for a day and get into Disney Land for free.

My feelings on the whole Disney program have softened though ever since I've had the chance to watch some of the truly caring volunteers that Disney was able to send our way. These were the people that got so excited when they saw our program description that most of them forgot to register for the Disney Ticket. I'm not holding taking the ticket against people (I know how expensive they are), I just sometimes think that sometimes a few dedicated volunteers that are going to stick around and get to know the kids are more valuable than a lot of flaky volunteers that are going to do the minimum and then bail.

So I have to admit (somewhat grudgingly) that Disney did do me a service in getting the word about my program out there to people that might not otherwise have heard about it. February was our biggest month, and I probably have the Give a Day get a Day program to thank for that. I can't help thinking though, if I had spent the hours that disappeared while I answered emails actively recruiting instead, could I have started even more volunteers?

What do you guys think? Do programs like this cheapen the volunteer experience, or help make it more accessible?

FROZEN SPIDERWEB

This is dedicated to all those I could not serve....

I feel like I
should write a song to sing
to all those I have witnessed
give

to all those who lived.
As I think
about it all
Don't want lyrics
or a chorus
a hook

with a beginning and
an end
Body
where people can measure trends
My gift is a
poem
where the story
is sustained

A reflection of
the tireless arms
that remain
outstretched
even when pushed away.
Words where the meaning is
translucent
transformational
tributary.

A lesson of balance
is what I will take from
my years of structured service;
from trying too hard
too long
to serve
to give what I can
and no more

I see a blue iridescence
brilliant in the light
invisible at night
How subtly strong
and sound
is she

with her deceptively
tiny threads
they are different from every angle
the colors change
the direction differs
the expectations escalate

can you see
what you can do?
It is the spiral
that beckons and hypnotizes

paralyzes

what will I do now?

The Best of Intentions...

I was cleaning off my desk the other day and came across a Certificate of Appreciation I received in January and it made me laugh (on a day I REALLY needed it) so I thought I would share the story with all of you in case you may need a little laugh.
So here’s the back story to the fateful day…
The UWPC Volunteer Center was invited to speak at a Professional Development Conference at a university that was looking for an interactive and informative presentation on volunteerism. The presentation was supposed to be between one and one and half hours but we didn’t have any training like this on hand so I was told to turn down the offer. However, I felt as the local Volunteer Center, we should make an effort to talk to community members about volunteering and I believed there was worth in developing a basic training so I got to work. Throughout the development I was repeatedly told, especially when I asked for feedback, “don’t worry about that, don’t put too much effort into it, it doesn’t need to be perfect, they're expecting too much, it’s okay to give a 10 minute overview of our services and leave, don’t feel obligated, you can cancel at any time, don’t go stressing yourself out.” But I knew this had worth so I argued my point and stuck to my convictions… and stopped asking for feedback. I persevered like a good VISTA and managed to put together the training in addition to my other, more important work.
The fateful day…
I woke up early and unbelievably arrived at the university a half hour ahead of schedule. I met with the contact person and she set me up in the training room, handed me a sign-in sheet, a stack of evaluation forms and an envelope with a Certificate of Appreciation inside. She then said good-bye and moved on to her next assignment. I stood in the room alone wondering if the upfront certificate made any sense. What if everyone filled out an evaluation saying the presentation was awkward and useless? I put that out of my head and went over my notes. After a while I checked the clock and realized to my dismay that the session was supposed to be starting and I was still alone in the room… maybe the faculty and staff at this university were perpetually late like me? Then I saw someone coming – relief! She walked through the door, looked around and said “I was afraid I was going to be late.”
We struck up a conversation about what may have gone wrong… people on that campus apparently often do run late… the university had decided not to have people pre-register for presentations so I had no idea how many people might be showing up... It was an 8am presentation on volunteerism… There was another presentation happening at the same time… Maybe my proposal on the presentation wasn’t eye catching enough (in my defense, I had written the proposal prior to writing the presentation). After my one participant finished sharing other mishaps about the university not having people pre-register for presentations I gave her some information about the Volunteer Center and ways to get connected to volunteer opportunities and let her off the hook. She thanked me and as she walked out of the room she said “well I guess I’ll sneak into the other presentation, I think there was standing room only.” Afraid of what I lost to, I hesitantly asked “What’s the other presentation.” Smiling apologetically she replied “Protecting yourself against identity theft.” Suddenly not so ashamed about my utter failure I chuckled and waved good-bye.
Lessons learned...
1. Identity theft is more relevant to the general population than volunteerism 2. This one’s stolen and paraphrased... sometimes it’s about the journey not the destination 3. Convictions are great but a sense of humor is a necessity 4. Don’t hand out Certificates of Appreciation BEFORE a presentation… in the end I would prefer if my read “This certificate is presented to Samantha Murphy with appreciation for the most amount of effort ever put into recruiting one volunteer.”