So I misunderstood the instructions for posting on this blog, and I wanted to try and catch up with the other great, insightful VISTAs on this team. In reading this blog I've noticed a lot of complicated feelings about the job of a VISTA, and I wanted to put in my two cents.

First and foremost I've seen this position as a learning opportunity. I'll admit, it's hard to never see the impact that you're making, and to work extremely hard for what you know is a fraction of what you know you could be making at something entirely different. It's also really different for me personally to be given so much responsibility (managing 137 volunteers), when at my previous jobs I wasn't even trusted to stand at the customer service desk.

I think the most important thing I've learned is that sitting at a desk and delivering indirect service isn't for me. However, I think a year worth of doing something I'm not always crazy about is worth getting the experience that will ultimately help me get to where I WANT to go. After this year I'll have an idea of how a non-profit works, and I'll be able to take that information and use it in the sort of grass-roots work that I think I'd prefer. Also, I now know that I absolutely love working with children. If I hadn't stumbled upon a VISTA job where I'd get to work with preschoolers, I might be on an entirely different career path right now. As it is, the plan is to work with kids in the social work or hearing and speech therapy fields.

So yes, I have days when I will pull my hair out if I have to send one more email or make one more spreadsheet. But I've decided to take it for what it is and learn from it. I know that this time next year freaking out about my PPRs will seem like no big deal.